Managing your teens expectations and behaviors of your teens during Christmas.

I remember when I was in secondary school and some teens were reminiscing their Christmas and new year celebration experiences to each other.... In an attempt not to feel like the odd one out, one had to lie about her clothing and all.... Meanwhile, another girl who claimed she saw her on Christmas Day debunked her claim and it resulted into a big fight... Christmas is around the corner and it is natural for our teens and the entire family to be excited about all the goodies....foods, gifts, outings, party with friends and families...etc. Our teens are under pressure from friend’s expectations....they want to have a celebration they could brag about...”a trip to Dubai” would be a very interesting one to share with friends you know!... Some of us parents had made promises right from the last celebration what and what gifts we would be buying for our children. All these coupled with the fact that this season is a time of amazing discount offers, constant exposure to adverts, promos, Black Friday deals and all.... We are all under pressure to buy and buy.....but hey, January is just around the corner, no promo on school fees😀!, non that I know of for now. It is very crucial we manage our teens expectations and behaviors this period because it could put a strain in the parent-teen relationship if expectations are not met.... You have made all the promises, fine! Your teens have their list and are expectant, yes! Life happened to all of us this year 2020 and things went beyond our control....convid 19, recession, hike in fuel price, prices of goods skyrocketed....etc *Take a deep breath, calm down...that you can still put food on the table for your children at this time, is a testimony...give yourself a pat at the back, you have done well. If your were able to pay your children school fees when school when school finally reopened, you have done better, well done. If possible you have saved, or have hope of where money is coming from to pay their school fees for another term in less than two months time, you have done excellently well. *sit down with your teens and discuss what is possible for Christmas this year. *together, look through their lists, separate wants from needs and what you can afford. The fact that you include them in the decision making and planning, they will be more willing to let go some expensive stuffs. *provide affordable substitutes, e.g you can go for a fairly used phone/bicycle to a new one. *together select old but good cloths,shoes and give out to the less privileged, let them know Christmas is about giving and not receiving alone. *take time out with your teens, bond with them, go out together, cook, bake together, intentionally create memories that last. A parent’s best gift to their children is the quality time they spend with them, don’t replace your presence with present, be available. There are times when your children need daddy and not candy, mummy and not money, presence and not present, be available.